Thursday, October 25, 2012

The next go-around

     Well folks,

     It looks like you're back, and it looks like I'm back, so I suppose we can get down to business. Despite my comments last week about whether Batman could foil the Joker's plot, given that I am neither a cartoonist, nor a screenwriter, I guess Batman's ultimate fate will be determined at the box office (which, if history is any indicator, means that Batman will have more money than Bruce Wayne by the end of the decade. Oh, wait...)

     Now that we have reached our second entry, I would like to give everyone the opportunity to applaud yourselves for being such ravenous fans of this blog. Go ahead, take thirty seconds to pat yourselves on the back. I'll wait. See, don't you feel better now? It has been your passionate responses to our news that have encouraged us to foray once again into that mystifying realm known as the blog-sphere (to whomever made up the term "blog-sphere": I am quite displeased with this word, and believe that you should be forced to read the OED [look it up people, I can't give away all of my secrets] from end to end until you realize that you have sadly mangled the English language). Heather and I have decided that one post per week will be more than sufficient, and I will try to shoot for Thursdays so that you will always have a sense of when the next post will be added, without being overwhelmed by my ponderous ramblings. I wanted to try a Friday spot, but the networks had given those away to the highest bidder (I guess my Nielson numbers aren't where they need to be this month), so Thursday AM was the only time I could negotiate (yes, I really did just play out a fictional pitch to TV networks). This week's theme: a recap of last week.

     After our announcement last Thursday, our world was turned upside down. The outpouring of love and support from our families and friends has been unbelievable. In the past week alone, people donated almost $1,500 to our adoption fund. Although we will not name names in order to preserve privacy, I do want to mention that your generosity has been beyond anything we could have hoped for. Heather and I are both grateful beyond words, and even though "Thank you!!!!!!" could never be enough, it will have to suffice until I can find more germane and descriptive methods of conveying our gratitude to you. Two days after our announcement, my cross-country teams competed at the state meet, and even more rewarding than their successes (winning the boys' race and taking 2nd in the girls' race), was the fact that in just two days, the team raised almost $200 dollars for our efforts. A special thanks to all of my runners and their parents for being so very selfless. Beyond the donations, all of your emails, phone calls, and FB posts have made the past week one of the happiest in our lives. I know we have a long way to go before we have a child, but, we are thankful to have such a wonderful support system place.

     I feel that ending a post on a maudlin note may make some of you unhappy, and so, with that in mind, I'd like to give you thoughts to ponder until our next meeting. The first is this: how can so many different super-heroes live in New York City? I mean, Superman, Batman, Robin, Batgirl, The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, The Fantastic Four, Spiderman, the X-men(well at least in NY state), Captain America and the Hulk all have residence in the city. How much protection does one city really need? Are the bad guys there really so tough? Or is it all of the sewer rats? Second: was the revision to Star Wars IV, where Greedo was made to shoot first, a good idea? Doesn't that fundamentally alter the character of Han Solo? Third: why is football (American) called football? This game uses feet only very rarely, and yet, still claims the same name as a game where feet are the only method of moving a ball (excluding goalies). Finally: why are tropical storms that are not yet full tropical storms called tropical depressions? Does the movement of wet air cause sadness among people in the tropics? Does the movement of wet air cause the atmosphere itself to become depressed? And if so, is there a therapist large enough to deal with the atmosphere as a whole? And if so, would that therapist ask the atmosphere about its childhood? I don't know. In fact, I don't have the answers to any of these questions, and would like answers. So, please, take some time, consider these things, and let me know. The best answers will make it into next week's post. Thanks for indulging me and playing along.


'Til next time, sports fans-

John and Heather

Thursday, October 18, 2012

A New Hope

       First things first: I need to apologize to George Lucas for such a shameless use of such a magnificent movie title. Or perhaps he should pay me an advertising fee for plugging his hexilogy. Either way, I digress.

      Now that that's done, I can move on. I would like to welcome all of you: friends, family, and (hopefully) devoted followers to our blog. If you are wondering why you are looking at this blog, I suppose I should start in the middle, work backwards to the beginning, reference the middle again, before proceeding to the end. If this seems a bit confusing to you, I would suggest that you consider the Schroedinger paradigm, as I suspect that his ideas will influence time travel and allow my thought-processes to make sense in a time-shifted universe. (Disclaimer: whenever John blogs, you will read lots of nerdy science-related ideas, so be prepared to rehash Star Wars and string theory. Whenever Heather blogs, you will find posts that make sense, are easy to read, and are generally to the point. I mention this so that you will always know whose post you are reading.)
        On to the middle of this story. After seven years of being married, we decided that despite being quite happy with our lives, we needed to begin giving back. And so, we have begun the long (very, very, very) process of adopting a child. Some of you may be asking yourself, "Them? Parents?" Let me assure you, we had to ask ourselves the same question before we began this process. After a long period of thinking and praying, we decided that, "Yes, us." After teaching and being married for a full six years, we believe that we finally have the wherewithal to be parents. Now, back to the beginning.
        Heather and I have always known that we wanted to be parents, but we also knew that having kids the first year in a new job would be a risky move. So we waited. For two long years, we waited. And then, we decided to have a child. And we tried. And tried. And tried. And tried. Some of you may be wondering, "Why didn't they get a clue early on?" The answer is that we didn't really want to face the facts. But eventually, we saw a fertility specialist, who gave us a few ideas, but little hope. And so, we went through a period of unhappiness (sorry to those of you affected by said period). Thankfully, that period ended. And then, Heather posed an idea that had never really crossed my mind: adoption. I don't know why I never thought about it, I mean, it's not like I was unaware that adoption existed, but it was almost as if adoption sat squarely in a blind-spot in my mind. I had more or less made up my mind that I would never have the chance to be a parent, and then, Heather broached this idea. Now, I have to admit, at first I was hesitant. I wasn't sure if this was something I wanted to tackle. Heather, however was absolutely on fire with the thought of finally being able to be a parent. After Heather spent untold hours doing research, she finally changed my mind and got me excited about the idea. Scared? More than you know, but excited nonetheless. So, why I am starting off our blog and not Heather, when it was her idea? Well, in truth, given that my degree is in English (which I know a lot of people think is a useless degree), we decided that I might be better suited to the task of kicking off a blog that will be a record of our triumphs and tragedies as we travel down the road of becoming parents. Now back to the mdidle of the story.
       Heather, as I said, did a lot of research, before finding the agency that we hope will be the right match for us, and will enable us to become parents. The agency is the Adoption Network Law Center, an organization that focuses solely on domestic adoptions. We have chosen this agency for three reasons. 1) This is a Christian organization that helps provide support to women who have the courage to not choose abortion. 2) As a law center, this organization specializes in smoothing out some of the tricky legal issues surrounding abortion. 3) Since this agency specializes in domestic adoption, we are  increasing our chances of being selected to be parents, and are providing an option for one of the many, many people in need in our own country. I know that many people opt for foreign adoption, but we believe that there are enough people in need right here at home that need to be taken care of, and we believe in acting on a local level whenever possible. I realize that this makes us sound a bit provincial, and I suppose it makes us so, but need is need, and we feel that it is easiest to act when in close proximity to that need. And so, you will be hearing a great deal about ANLC on this blog, and if you are part of a select few, ANLC may contact you to give references for us. Thanks in advance for that, by the way. Ok, so finally, on to the end, as I promised at the beginning. Or was that really the middle? Or was it a trans-positional statement back-narrated to fit the flow of the post? I have no idea. But it is fun to consider. Anyway, on to the end.
      One of the greatest challenges facing all people considering adoption is the cost. On average, a family who adopts will spend somewhere between $30,000 and $50,000. This is all money that is spent before a child ever is carried through the front door of your home. This cost is scary. This cost can be prohibitive. Yes, there are grants, and yes, there are subsidized loans, but in the end, a great deal of money is still required to adopt a child. And so, we are going to shamelessly ask for help. Over the next several months, both Heather and I will be posting links to websites that we are creating to help raise funds that will help us adopt a child. Right at the outset, let me say this: if you cannot support us financially, we understand completely, and bear you no ill will whatsoever. Also, if you feel that supporting a family who is adopting is somehow a bad idea, we also understand, and won't be upset. However, we hope that as we take this journey, you will come along for the ride, and will help out in whatever ways you see fit. The very first website for fundraising is already on the web, and I promised Heather I would plug it in our very first blog entry. So here it is: justlovecoffee.com/woventogether . My understanding is that you go to the site, buy coffee, and part of the proceeds goes toward our adoption fund. Hopefully, many of you love coffee. :-) If the link doesn't work, let us know. Also, if you have a hard time figuring out what to do while at the site, let us know and we can blog a more detailed set of instructions. For now, let me thank you again for coming along on this journey with us, and we will continue to update the blog on a regular basis.
             So now, in the words of the incomparable Stan Lee, "Excelsior!" And in the words of both Captain Kirk, and Captain Picard, "Engage!" And finally, in the words of Luke Skywalker, "I [we] am [are] a Jedi, like my [our] father[s] before me [us]!" Tune in next week to see if Batman can foil the Joker's evil plot.