1/2 way there!!

Hi everyone!  I know you all have been anxiously awaiting what John is going to write about next, but he is very busy this week so you will be hearing from me.

Our exciting news from this week is that we are now ½ way to our waiting family goal and 1/3 of the way to our total fundraising goal.  We are so excited and can’t thank all of you enough.  John and I have put this adoption in God’s hands and He is definitely taking care of us.  It is absolutely amazing to me that it was just over a month ago that we announced we were adopting.

 I remember the first time John and I considered adopting.  It was almost 2 years ago.  We started to research agencies and what was involved in the adoption process.  At that point, we saw the $30,000 price tag and thought that adoption would not be an option for us for a very long time. But, the pull to adopt never went away. This past October I couldn’t shake the feeling that we needed to adopt.  The pull was so strong that I knew I needed to talk to John about it and I would trust that if it was the right decision for us God would open doors.  I sent John a Facebook message telling him what I had been thinking about and asking him to think and pray and we could talk more about it at home.  Very quickly John responded that he was on board with me.  For the next couple weeks, I did TONS of research.  I read up on agencies, called agencies, read adoption blogs, and bookmarked all the adoption information I could. I also had to do my best to keep my mouth shut.  For those who know me well you know how hard that is for me.  I was so excited when we got accepted by ANLC and could finally share our news with everyone.

Now we are on our way to becoming a waiting family and eventaully parents.  We couldn’t be more excited.  We know there are a lot of hoops to jump through and lots more waiting to come but for right now we are focusing on our blessings and enjoying our time together.

The Thanksgiving Episode

           Dear Fans,
Since this is Thanksgiving Day, I will keep the post short, and to the point (if that is even possible for someone like me). Let me begin with my list of "thankful fors".

I am thankful for:
-you, the fans
-Heather
-turkey
-an interwebs that allows me the room to rant, rave, prognosticate, and blather
-the Chicago Bears (although I don't know why anymore)
-fall weather
-turkey
-the movie Elf (which you need to see if you have not already)
- space exploration
-the adoption process (see, I told you I would always find a way to mention it)
-dogs (but most certainly NOT cats)
-turkey
-Wall E (one of the best movies of all time)
-fire
-quirky friends
-an enthusiastic basketball team (and girls, if you are reading this, go run 3 miles)
-Lake Owen (if you don't know, you should go find out [or ask me sometime])
-turkey

Ok. That is out of the way. On to business. Well, we would go on to business, if there were business that needed attending. But let's face it: it's Thanksgiving, and I am so fixated on the impending turkey that I can't focus on much else. Oh, on a side note: Heather fed me bacon for breakfast this morning. That means that in one glorious day, I will consume every single one of my favorite foods. Which is excellent, but sets the bar awfully high for food on the other 364 days of the year. Despite that, I will survive, and once today is over, I will soldier on until next Thanksgiving. After we demolish the turkey (and yes, when my brother and I are in the same room, food gets demolished, not eaten), we will spend the afternoon and evening playing a wide variety of games, including the ever popular Solar Quest (if you are unaware of this magnificent game, I highly recommend that you find a copy and play it [although currently on eBay, the game is going for around $200. This is a ripoff, given that when it was  purchased for my birthday many years ago, it was less than $30]).

I know that many people are using the interwebs to post lists of deep and meaningful things that they are thankful for, but it bothers me that people only do this around Thanksgiving. I mean, shouldn't people be grateful year-round, and express that gratitude likewise? I hope that all of you fans will do better than this, and be thankful for everything you have, but on a daily basis. If you are, I believe you will lead much more satisfying lives. However, today is a great day for letting people know that you are thankful to and for them, so I encourage all of you to say "thanks" to at least one person today. I want to say a big "thank you!!!!" to all of our faithful readers and donors, who are helping us reach our goal of pre-funding our adoption. Also, a big thanks goes out to my folks who are hosting this wonderful day of fun and feasting. Finally, a big thanks to all of you out there who have been a part of my life this past year-without you, I would literally be all alone, which would have been boring, so I am deeply grateful that you filled what would have otherwise been a very empty calendar with many joyous events, shin-digs, hoe-downs, and hootenannies, and all of the other various experiences we have shared this year, all of which have made this past year what it was, which is a truism, I know, but sometimes, when you are focused on turkey, truisms are the only way you can express yourself clearly in what is obviously a ridiculous run-on that is created to draw your attention to said run-on, and to keep people guessing as to when the run on will end, without ever giving away the ending, or even attempting to make meaning as the end of the sentence draws nigh, which it does, but not quite yet, as it is quite enjoyable to write run-ons like this one, and I hope you all enjoy reading the run-on, and that you enjoy a wonderful Thanksgiving Day! Until we meet again, my friends. I am off to a date I have with some turkey.

-J&H-

The Baby Convergence

     ::knock:: ::knock:: Yes, hello? You're looking for whom? Oh, the verbose yet taciturn gentlemen with no hair? Follow me, he's right over there by the window. Let me warn you, be careful when speaking to him, as he is startled by loud noises, and you don't want to see him startled. Why? It's just not pretty. Ok, here we are. Just remember what I told you about him.

     Y-yes? Who are you? Go away. I want to take a nap. Oh, you're one of my readers. That's ok, then. Sit down, rest a spell. You want me to tell another strory? Ok, I suppose since you've come all this way, that you should get something for your time. Let me think. Hmmm, what story to tell you? Oh, I know. This story is called the Baby Convergence. It begins, "Once upon a time..."

     Once upon a time, Heather and I started making a plan to adopt a child (sorry to keep harping on this, but as that is the purpose of this blog, I need to keep mentioning it).Once we did that, we began to notice something strange. Many of our friends, acquaintances, FB followers, etc., were all getting pregnant just as we were learning that it might take us two years to adopt. Everywhere I look, I see couples who are pregnant, and proudly displaying the sonogram photos for everyone's enjoyment. I am afraid to look behind me, for fear that a large group of pregnant ladies will be chasing me (I realize this sounds like a paranoid delusion, but it is really a hyperbolic statement of satire). There is even a name for this condition of seeing relevant data in irrelevant places. It is officially known as Blue Car Syndrome, but given that my interest is not in blue cars (nor do I own said car), I think that calling it the Baby Convergence is much more effective. And enjoyable. And humorous. And.
     Although the Baby Convergence is an intriguing way to approach the study of human observation, what is more meaningful to me is how much the Baby Convergence is teaching me about myself. Specifically, how impatient I am. Now, I realize that most of you already know how impatient I am, but this discovery is new to me. I always had some inkling that I was not the most patient person by nature (shocking, I know), but was totally unaware of the depth of my own impatience. Before this experience, I assumed that I was fairly level-headed, and able to keep perspective on things. I now know that I am not level-headed when I can't get what I want, when I want it (and to you readers who are Shewamegonites, I am sure this comes as no surprise). And so, I am beginning the very arduous, and irritating, process of becoming more patient. Every day, I need to remind my self that there is an endgame in play, and that I just need to hang on long enough to see it. Or, pull out my hair trying. Oh, wait...
     Anyway, it occurs to me that perhaps this waiting period can be used as a test. I am told that parents need patience more than just about anything else except for sleep. Perhaps then, this waiting period should be viewed as a test. I have long advocated the idea that if possible, people should be forced to take a parenting exam prior to having or adopting a child. Perhaps, just perhaps, this is my version of that test. If I can't be patient over the course of a year or two, how can I possibly be patient over the course of 20+ years of a child trying to give me a heart-attack via their foolish actions. And once we do adopt, there are no do-overs, or take-backsies, so I guess I need to learn now, not later. For those of you who know me well, I hope you can view these few years with a sense of comic-relief (and yes, you can have a sense like that [to my ravenous grammar and English teacher friends, I know that this is not TECHNICALLY correct, and so although my syntax is not perfect here, my sense of the language shines through]). If you are ever having a bad day, just picture me trying to be patient, and I think you will laugh hard enough to make your bad day turn good. See? This blog IS good for something.
     Another interesting note about the Baby Convergence is how much it has opened my eyes to the subculture of adoption. Prior to starting this endeavor, I was only aware of a few people who had tried to, or sucessfully completed, the adoption process. Now, however, I am meeting more and more people who are in the same boat as I am. And I am learning, to my great relief, that many of these people are as impatient as I am. I realize that this is textbook schadenfreude (look it up people), but it makes me feel better about my own lack of patience. Or, is it really normal, and I am not impatient after all? No, that doesn't sound at all right. I suppose I should revise that idea. Ok, I am impatient, but at least I am in good company. If a group of impatient people who are trying to be patient can be seen as good company. I suppose it could equally be viewed as a powder keg about to explode. Which, for those not involved, has the potential to be quite funny. I highly recommend that you all send words of encouragement to Heather, as she is living next to the powder keg. She needs all the help she can get. Maybe you, Dear Reader, can take turns with her, as she guards me on my quest for patience. Either that, or send her a plane ticket for Hawaii, so she can relax after dealing with me all the time. That poor, poor girl.

     "...and they lived happily ever after." Did you like the story? I hope so. My story-telling isn't what it used to be. All I do is talk to the walls, and stare out the window, so I'm not that great at relating stories any more. I do hope you'll come back; it gets lonely around here at this time of year. Ahh, here is the orderly. No doubt, he is here to take you back to the front desk. Thanks again for the visit.

     So, how was he? Oh, that's good. He doesn't talk much anymore, so I'm glad he opened up to you. You didn't startle him, did you? Good. Any chance we can talk you into coming back again? We think that if he talks enough, he may function well enough to one day get out of here. We hope you enjoyed your time, and will be willing to volunteer here more often. Oh, really? He told you THAT story? I can see why you don't want to return. Well, hopefully you will change your mind. Have a nice afternoon.

A Gracious Gift

       Hello again, friends. I see you have returned for the fourth installment of the story that is our journey towards adoption. I am glad you have all found the time to return once again to this strange, if whimsical blog again. Heather has asked that I get some business taken care of before I begin rambling, and so, I will. First, Heather informs me that our Etsy website has been updated, with lots of new goodies for you crafty to buy and enjoy. I don't really know much about Etsy, but I do know that our house is filling up with crafts, knick-knacks, and ephemera, so please, do ME a favor, and at least check out the site. If you don't, I may be forced to add another storey to our house, which means I would need ALL of you to come over and help, and since I know that most of you lack the carpentry skills necessary, I think your best bet is to go to our Etsy site, and see what is there. Second piece of business: many of you have asked about the "chip-in" button on the right side of our blog. Specifically, many of you want to know where your donations go. So, for better or worse, I'll let you in on that secret. Any donations received go to us, via PayPal. We are operating this way so that we protect ourselves, and our (and your) investment. If donations went directly to an adoption agency, we would run the risk of losing the money, and having to start all over again (and yes, it does happen to some people). Ok, business complete. On to the rambling.
       The title of this post was chosen very carefully to reflect the main thrust of this week's post- suprise, suprise, a title that is relevant to the topic chosen [can you tell that I teach English?]. The gift in question is noteworthy not for its monetary value (although I do not want to denigrate the gift by dismissing its value, which, in our situation is never small), but the sentiment behind it. One of my students (whose name and gender will remain anonymous- there are too many of you faithful readers who know my students to allow me to give you any clues- but I will give you all a hint- this person is in some way related to the state of Indiana, and so I will call this person Indiana for the rest of the post), approached me two weeks ago to offer a donation to Heather's and my cause. Indiana had recently starting working an afterschool (and weekend) job, and wanted to give us a gift. Indiana then proceeded to tell me that he/she/it (in case my student is actually a hyper-intelligent starfish) had decided to give Heather and me a portion of each paycheck they received from work.
       Near tears (and for those of you who know me well, know what a remarkable feat THAT is), I told the student that I appreciated the gesture, but that he/she/it (again, just in case, as you never want to offend hyper-intelligent starfish [the plural of which I am hereby unilaterally deciding will be starfishen]) had already done more than we could have dreamed, and so did not need to make such a selfless commitment. However, Indiana informed me that in his/her/its view, our cause was worth the sacrifice, and that his/her/its belief was that he/she/it was investing in a child. That phrase caught me off guard. Investing in a child. I had never precisely thought about it that way, but yes, that is exactly what we, and you, Dear Reader, are doing. The ROI (look it up- as a former Econ teacher, I want to use this moment to spread some investing knowledge) will be a very low dollar amount, but will be huge in life equity.
       Anyway, back to Indiana. I was stunned by the generosity of the student, especially given that we had not always operated together under the ideal teacher/student paradigm. My view of this student was that Indiana had lots of talent and ability, and (in my view) a deep desire to not use them. How wrong I was. In that moment, faced with unexpected generosity, I was forced to confront my own limited view of Indiana, and forced to integrate my new insight into my view of this student. I began to see clearly that I had held Indiana to a standard that I would not hold other students, and that by doing so, I had pigeon-holed Indiana into a unrealistic expectation. Looking with new eyes, I saw what I had missed before: a kind, caring student, who took life seriously, but enjoyed not having to be serious at all times. I want to use this blog to issue a public apology to Indiana, for so wrongly judging him/her/it. I am not doing this because of the donation, but because the donation forced me to see how wrong I had been for a long time. I don't know if Indiana will ever read this, but I hope so, so that he/she/it will know that I have recanted, and that I hope we can move forward in a more productive (on my end) fashion.
       Why am I telling this story? Is it for penance? To raise money? To shamelessly get some of you to cry while reading this? The answer is: D) None of the above. I am relating this story because I believe that in our society, generosity is overlooked, and indeed, is sometimes seen as foolish sentiment and weakness. I am writing this because I believe that generosity is not weak, and that when someone does good in secret, they deserve to be praised publicly by others. I believe that in general, kindness is no longer seen as one of the paramount virtues of society, and I believe that we need to change this perception. So, yes, Heather and I would appreciate any donation you may care to make, but no, we don't want anyone to feel guilty or unhappy if you choose to not donate. We understand how difficult giving money can be in this less-than-desireable economy. If you feel donating is not an option, given what I have said earlier, then instead, we urge that you consider doing three random acts of kindness after reading this post. I would like to think that in some small way, if we all act together, we can begin to restore the civic virtue of kindness to its rightful place. Thanks again for coming along on this journey, and I challenge all of you to become an Indiana to someone in your life. We'll be back with more- same time, same place. Until then Dear Reader, adieu.
                                                              -Heather and John-

A (Mock) Tragic Tale

         Dear Reader,
I have very sad news to relate. LucasFilm Limited is being purchased by Disney, Inc. I realize that many of you don't know much about George Lucas, or LucasFilm, and I further realize that many of you who do know about LFL don't care much about the aforementioned purchase, but for the tiny minority of you who do care, read on.
         To begin, let's review Lucas's legacy in the film world. American Graffiti was an interesting take on a nostalgic world that never really existed. But herein lies the rub: it was the perfect run-up to perhaps the most influential movie franchise in history. And then came The Trilogy. In all ways, one of the best movie series in history, as well as one of the most loved. Beyond the iconic characters, the franchise became an archetype for all future movie makers and viewers alike. The Trilogy changed not only how we see movies, but also changed our expectations in regards to story telling. I must admit, the New Trilogy pales in comparison to the Original, but having said that, I still find the New to be far beyond the capacity of most story-tellers. Add to this resume the Indiana Jones quadrilogy, and the smashing success of ILM and Skywalker Sound, and you have one of the most important film empires (yes, the pun is intended) in film history.
         Enter Walt Disney. Another apotheotic name in the film world. I have read much press that indicates how wonderful this merger will be for all involved. But here is the problem as I see it. Disney tends to spin its purchased assets into mirror-versions of itself. I am afraid that Disney will make Star Wars look like Mickey with a lightsaber. I feel that Disney is unable to distance itself from its magic money-making formula in order to embrace the individuality of the asset in question. It makes me quake to contemplate the loss of identity that Star Wars will undergo to fit in with the other Disney "kids". My brother-in-law asserts that Disney will only reimagine the SW universe a bit, and will leave intact the central heart of the franchise. But how can that be so? Can Disney afford to promote a style of film, and film-making, that is so antithetical its own success? I hope so, but don't believe it will happen. Anyway, I welcome your thoughts and condolences as I mourn the loss of such a cherished franchise.
          Oh, and if you and wondering about our road to adoption, I will liken it to the road Lucas had to take to get A New Hope created- very long, very winding, but ultimately supremely worthwhile. See you next week, Dear Reader.

-John and Heather-