Hello again, friends. I see you have returned for the fourth installment of the story that is our journey towards adoption. I am glad you have all found the time to return once again to this strange, if whimsical blog again. Heather has asked that I get some business taken care of before I begin rambling, and so, I will. First, Heather informs me that our Etsy website has been updated, with lots of new goodies for you crafty to buy and enjoy. I don't really know much about Etsy, but I do know that our house is filling up with crafts, knick-knacks, and ephemera, so please, do ME a favor, and at least check out the site. If you don't, I may be forced to add another storey to our house, which means I would need ALL of you to come over and help, and since I know that most of you lack the carpentry skills necessary, I think your best bet is to go to our Etsy site, and see what is there. Second piece of business: many of you have asked about the "chip-in" button on the right side of our blog. Specifically, many of you want to know where your donations go. So, for better or worse, I'll let you in on that secret. Any donations received go to us, via PayPal. We are operating this way so that we protect ourselves, and our (and your) investment. If donations went directly to an adoption agency, we would run the risk of losing the money, and having to start all over again (and yes, it does happen to some people). Ok, business complete. On to the rambling.
The title of this post was chosen very carefully to reflect the main thrust of this week's post- suprise, suprise, a title that is relevant to the topic chosen [can you tell that I teach English?]. The gift in question is noteworthy not for its monetary value (although I do not want to denigrate the gift by dismissing its value, which, in our situation is never small), but the sentiment behind it. One of my students (whose name and gender will remain anonymous- there are too many of you faithful readers who know my students to allow me to give you any clues- but I will give you all a hint- this person is in some way related to the state of Indiana, and so I will call this person Indiana for the rest of the post), approached me two weeks ago to offer a donation to Heather's and my cause. Indiana had recently starting working an afterschool (and weekend) job, and wanted to give us a gift. Indiana then proceeded to tell me that he/she/it (in case my student is actually a hyper-intelligent starfish) had decided to give Heather and me a portion of each paycheck they received from work.
Near tears (and for those of you who know me well, know what a remarkable feat THAT is), I told the student that I appreciated the gesture, but that he/she/it (again, just in case, as you never want to offend hyper-intelligent starfish [the plural of which I am hereby unilaterally deciding will be starfishen]) had already done more than we could have dreamed, and so did not need to make such a selfless commitment. However, Indiana informed me that in his/her/its view, our cause was worth the sacrifice, and that his/her/its belief was that he/she/it was investing in a child. That phrase caught me off guard. Investing in a child. I had never precisely thought about it that way, but yes, that is exactly what we, and you, Dear Reader, are doing. The ROI (look it up- as a former Econ teacher, I want to use this moment to spread some investing knowledge) will be a very low dollar amount, but will be huge in life equity.
Anyway, back to Indiana. I was stunned by the generosity of the student, especially given that we had not always operated together under the ideal teacher/student paradigm. My view of this student was that Indiana had lots of talent and ability, and (in my view) a deep desire to not use them. How wrong I was. In that moment, faced with unexpected generosity, I was forced to confront my own limited view of Indiana, and forced to integrate my new insight into my view of this student. I began to see clearly that I had held Indiana to a standard that I would not hold other students, and that by doing so, I had pigeon-holed Indiana into a unrealistic expectation. Looking with new eyes, I saw what I had missed before: a kind, caring student, who took life seriously, but enjoyed not having to be serious at all times. I want to use this blog to issue a public apology to Indiana, for so wrongly judging him/her/it. I am not doing this because of the donation, but because the donation forced me to see how wrong I had been for a long time. I don't know if Indiana will ever read this, but I hope so, so that he/she/it will know that I have recanted, and that I hope we can move forward in a more productive (on my end) fashion.
Why am I telling this story? Is it for penance? To raise money? To shamelessly get some of you to cry while reading this? The answer is: D) None of the above. I am relating this story because I believe that in our society, generosity is overlooked, and indeed, is sometimes seen as foolish sentiment and weakness. I am writing this because I believe that generosity is not weak, and that when someone does good in secret, they deserve to be praised publicly by others. I believe that in general, kindness is no longer seen as one of the paramount virtues of society, and I believe that we need to change this perception. So, yes, Heather and I would appreciate any donation you may care to make, but no, we don't want anyone to feel guilty or unhappy if you choose to not donate. We understand how difficult giving money can be in this less-than-desireable economy. If you feel donating is not an option, given what I have said earlier, then instead, we urge that you consider doing three random acts of kindness after reading this post. I would like to think that in some small way, if we all act together, we can begin to restore the civic virtue of kindness to its rightful place. Thanks again for coming along on this journey, and I challenge all of you to become an Indiana to someone in your life. We'll be back with more- same time, same place. Until then Dear Reader, adieu.
-Heather and John-
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